Book Review: The Clock in My Head Never Stops

Reviewed by Addison Ciuchta

A piercing and tense day-in-the-life of a high-anxiety teenager navigating high school

The Clock In My Head Never Stops follows teenager Billy Thompson through one day in his life as he navigates high school, friendships, and football practice. Throughout the day, Billy experiences high levels of anxiety. Anxiety about his homework, about reading aloud in class, about social dynamics, about his success or failure as an athlete, and, most of all, about his future. It’s an absorbing look into the mind of a sixteen-year-old boy under an immense amount of pressure, all from within.

We experience Billy’s anxiety first-hand, which reinforces the story as a way to shed light on how pressure can impact young adults. His unforgiving and at times mean inner monologue is a constant thread weighing on him, casting his every interaction in a negative light. Even things most people wouldn’t think twice about like how they sit at a cafeteria table or how to join a conversation are details that he thinks and overthinks about, just adding to the weight of his existence. His perspective is a heavy one little relief throughout the day. It gives the whole book a claustrophobic, suffocatory feeling. Which is the point!

As a result, the narrative lacks some dynamism because of the way it’s structured. Since it only follows Billy throughout one day in his life, everything feels similar tonally as he has the same thoughts over and over again, class after class. He worries about having not finished his homework or having not done enough of it or getting more of it. He worries about having to read a paragraph out loud in History class or being called on to answer a question in Spanish. There’s no real change in the tone or mood of the story as it progresses since it’s class after class, interaction after interaction, of the same feeling and the same thoughts. I longed for moments of relief, adding something different to the mix and giving Billy and readers a moment to breathe, but it’s true that this experimental structure paints a vivid picture of accurately overwhelming anxiety.

The book’s epilogue, which covers what happens after the day ends, offers much more insight and dynamism to his story, revealing his subsequent breakdown and necessary support. It’s more an afterthought, even though it feels like that’s where the primary story lies.

Billy, though a sympathetic character because of his intense struggle with anxiety, is rude and arrogant at times, putting down students around him for being more popular, more athletic, or having an easier time of things than he does. He thinks sexual comments about almost every girl or woman who is introduced. He’s a teenage boy, so again, it makes sense—but the girls in his class and his teachers are portrayed more as objects to ogle, and it doesn’t change, so the learning lesson of them being real, three-dimensional humans isn’t really there. He’s resentful and mean, at times, toward the teachers in his classes for doing their jobs or for reading while proctoring a test. While all of that is stemming from his mental health issues, it makes it hard to difficult to connect with him without a trace of his softer, kinder side.

The author’s dedication at the start of the book and the final lines of the epilogue, “if you are suffering from anxiety, get help. You are not alone. You can get better,” drive home the very real issues that the book exposes. High school and young adulthood can be times of real stress and anxiety for kids; it’s a deeply important topic to bring to light. Billy’s constant internal monologue of pure anxiety is something many may relate to and find recognition in, and the message behind it is a strong, meaningful one.

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