Oldest Mom on the Playground
by Judy Haveson
Genre: Memoir / Parenting & Relationships
ISBN: 9798986624952
Print Length: 310 pages
Reviewed by Elizabeth Reiser
An honest look at the highs and lows of parenting on a different timeline
What happens when your timeline does not match up with the expectations of others?
When Judy Haveson had her first and only child, a son named Jack, she was 43 years old. While it was something she and her husband desperately wanted, she had envisioned it happening much earlier in life. What would it mean to be a new mom in her forties? How would other people react? To put it simply: was she too old?
Written in a conversational style, Haveson has a talent for engaging with us. She is funny and charming, making it feel like chatting with a new friend. There are entertaining anecdotes shared throughout, especially as she talks about their neighborhood in New York City’s Upper West Side. The reader cannot help but feel Nora Ephron’s influence coming through the pages.
While Haveson is quick-witted, the sections where her writing shines most are when she allows herself to be vulnerable. There is a segment where she discusses the challenges of being sandwiched between being a new mom and feeling a responsibility to care for her aging parents. The guilt she feels for being unable to be everywhere at once is palpable, as are the feelings of loss and regret that come with losing loved ones.
The Oldest Mom on the Playground also offers an intriguing perspective of raising a child in New York City, specifically as someone with privilege. From finding the perfect set of Nannies (all college-educated, as specified by Haveson) to applying to the best (and also outrageously expensive) schools for her son, it is a world many may not be familiar with. It is fun to see behind the curtain as she humorously explains these trials.
Haveson writes this book as a reflection on becoming an older mom now that her child is in his teens. While some of the issues remain, the world (and science) is different than it is now. She also appears to have boundaries when revealing details about her life. While Haveson delves into the surface challenges of being an older mom, she does not touch on some of the more difficult moments, except when discussing her parents.As someone who became a mom at 41 (to a now 8-month-old), I couldn’t help but want more to connect about.
This is an enjoyable memoir, and fans of the genre will be happy. New parents will also like finding areas where they can relate to Haveson. It is a sweet and lighthearted tribute to her son and the two parents Haveson loves dearly.
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